Homecoming

It's been way too long, hasn't it? The rapid decline in activity on my blog since 2008 has got to stop. So, I thought I'd start by reintroducing myself on here. You see, this Wednesday I was at a work seminar thing where our new (and much larger team) were learning how to become a proper, tight knitted team. I hate those things because they usually involve the inevitable hideous teambuilding exercises. Thankfully we got off very easy and it was a lot more 'serious'. The last thing we had to do was stand up in front of everyone and present our Johanri window. Before the day we were to prepare our presentation and I nearly died presenting mine because I can't stand getting up in front of say 20 people and telling them about ourselves. It's not like I shared more than I wanted to, or felt comfortable sharing but rather that I don't like forced sharing. Of course it was interesting hearing everyone else talk about themselves. I took a few things with me from the seminar which are to be more energetic, positive and happy. I figure if I act like it, I will eventually become it.

A long story short, I thought I should reintroduce myself so I stole this meme from Ponita and figured it would be a good way of doing so.



1) ONE OF YOUR SCARS. HOW DID YOU GET IT?

I have a scar on my left knee. It was summer, I was seven years old and my parents were out in front of our house painting the windows. Of course without permission I brougth out my little inflatable paddling pool and started filling it with water on the lawn. Once it was filled I ran up the stone steps and turned off the water and then raced down the stone steps towards my pathetic little paddling pool only to fall and scrape my knee quite severely. I started crying very loudly (because it's no fun if people don't know you are in pain) but it took my parents about 10 minutes before they figured out it was me, and came out back and yelled at me.

As clear as if it were yesterday, I remember being on my bed crying and looking at my knee where at first blood was gushing oozing ticking out and then it was some weird clear liquid. It was very painful, and although the scar is tiny now, it's still visible and no, you may not see it. I am a gay guy of mystery afterall.
2) WHAT IS ON THE WALLS OF YOUR BEDROOM?

I don't have much on my bedroom walls. Mostly because I've got wardrobes and closets on most walls of the room but I do have a 2010 calendar.

It still has qualities, don't you think?

3) WHAT DOES YOUR MOBILE PHONE LOOK LIKE?

My mobile phone is an iPhone 3 GS

4) WHAT MUSIC DO YOU LISTEN TO?

I listen to mostly cheerful, happy pop music because it makes me happy. Listening to rock and those types of depressing music (including rap and r'n'b) makes me depressed. An example of a blast from the past that I like is this gem



DJ BOBO was a massive hit over here back in 1992.

5) DO YOU KNOW WHAT TIME YOU WERE BORN?

I never asked. Never thought it mattered - especially because I don't believe in all those astrology and numerology things.

6) WHAT DO YOU WANT MORE THAN ANYTHING RIGHT NOW?

An iPhone 4, an iPad 2 and a pair of new glasses. I'm modest like that.

7) WHO DO YOU MISS?

I miss my ex boyfriend and at times my aunt who died last year.

8) IS ANYONE IN LOVE WITH YOU OR HAS A CRUSH ON YOU?

Maybe my ex boyfriend. I can never tell as it's been was so on and off. I'm thinking no though.

9) WHO WAS THE LAST PERSON YOU KISSED?

A guy in New York. To protect his identity let's call him Jack.

10) WHAT IS YOUR MIDDLE NAME?

I don't have a middle name.

11) THE BEST TV SHOW EVER CREATED?



It's got to be Gilmore Girls or



Dynasty.

12) THE LAST PERSON YOU TALKED TO?

Dullface.

13) DO YOU GET SCARED IN THE DARK?

Only when I've watched something scary on TV or at the cinema. There are very few times when I actually miss having a boyfriend. I do on lazy weekends and while and after watching scary stuff.
14) THE LAST PERSON TO MAKE YOU CRY?

First of all you need to know that I'm a very sensitive/empathic person when it comes to all things miserable. Like death, illness, war and such. It influences my mood easily and makes me very sad. So when my boss lady told us at work that her brother had finally died of cancer after 15 years of struggling with it, it made me sad. I actually had a bit of a cry when I got home. I didn't know him so there was no rational thought behind it. It just made me really sad.

Another instance was also quite recently. I had some terrible class 'mates' in school. What they did to me is not the point, but the end result was me crying to which the teachers and school only had this to say:

Kids are cruel and what doesn't kill you makes you stronger.

It went on for 10 years and obviously I feel some if not a lot of hatred towards the instigator of all this. He is an awful person but I hadn't given him much thought over the past few years until Dullface mentioned having met him. Apparently they'd spoken briefly. Anyway Dullface just mentioned having met him and said how he'd gained weight which pleased me. This one thing did open up something because I had a dream about the school days again later that week which had me waking up sobbing. At least I never turned to violence. There's always a silver lining.



15) WHAT IS YOUR FAVOURITE COLOGNE/PERFUME?



16) WHAT KIND OF HAIR/EYE COLOUR DO YOU LIKE IN THE OPPOSITE SEX?

I like dark hair, short dark hair. To be honest I have no preferences when it comes to eye colour although something besides brown because my eye colour is brown.

17) WOULD YOU RATHER BE SMART OR FUNNY?

I'd rather be funny than smart. Funny people have more fun, I suppose. Smart people are often arrogant and dull.

18) COFFEE OR ENERGY DRINKS?

I've never had an energy drink ever and I don't drink proper coffee. I do like a café latté with a shot of espresso though.

19) WHAT IS YOUR FAVOURITE PIZZA TOPPING?

Gorgonzola cheese and cocktail sausages. Pure class all the way!

20) IF YOU COULD EAT ANYTHING RIGHT NOW, WHAT WOULD IT BE?

A pizza with gorgonzola cheese and cocktail sausages.

21) WHO IS THE LAST PERSON WHO MADE YOU MAD?

A customer who called me at work refusing to pay his car payment and insisting he didn't owe us money. He was quite rude. When you work in the department I work in, you get called a lot of names. Some more pleasant than others.

22) DO YOU SPEAK ANOTHER LANGUAGE?

I speak Danish, English, a bit of German and a tiny bit og Spanish and French. I can say good night in both Russian and Italian too. On the whole I love foreign languages.

The English language is a lot more precise than Danish and I like that. Although we do have different words for a boy and girl cousins in Danish.
23) WHAT WAS THE FIRST GIFT THAT YOU REMEMBER SOMEONE GIVING YOU?

My parent's old neighbours gave me a Daisy doll when I was 7. It wore a sparkly red cocktail dress, tiny red heels and had a cute short'ish hair style. I'm not sure if Daisy is related to Barbie in any way but I loved her. I think it was my first stylish doll. First of many. I much preferred to play with dolls to all those things the boys played with.

I'd play with the girls, they were a lot less mean to me and combined we had the largest Barbie doll house EVER. It was awesome! I loved my Barbies. My father didn't.

24) DO YOU LIKE SOMEONE?

I do. A lot but he doesn't like me in the same way. He's straight.
25) ARE YOU DOUBLE JOINTED?

No, but my knees are kind of weirdly bendy.

26) FAVOURITE CLOTHING BRAND?



Dolce & Gabbana.

27) WHAT IS YOUR DREAM CAR?

28) WHAT COLOUR IS IT?

Red. Or if I can't get that it would be alright with a black one I suppose.

29) WHAT IS YOUR FAVOURITE KIND OF EXERCISE?

I don't like exercise. I suppose sex would be a favourite type of exercise although I also enjoy walking. Sex is by far a favourite though.

30) WOULD YOU FALL IN LOVE KNOWING THAT THE PERSON IS LEAVING

How can you keep yourself from falling in love? I haven't been able to do that, so yes. It would be practical if I could shut off all emotions and avoid all that nonsense and it saves the heart ache but I guess there's no fun in that.

Well, that's it. Now it's only to look forward to the next time I can blog. Oh, and of course to be happy and positive. No more rain!

Get outta my way

It seems like forever ago I wrote my last annual review however it does feel like this year has passed by rather quickly. What's most disconcerting is that I can't remember much of it. I had to look most of it up. For instance, I can't remember the last time I read a book.

Another thing was when I took a couple of those news tests where you have to remember certain things that made the news this year. It gave me a 4/20 and a comment of "were you out of the country a lot?". Which I wasn't. I was home all year long, but I must not have paid attention. Then I took the 'celebrity scandals of 2010' test and scored 9/13. If that's a good or bad thing, I'll leave up to you to decide.

The year did just fly by, and we saw Kylie releasing a new album, Robbie rejoined Take That (and practically took over the BBC and ITV it seems) and The Black Eyed Peas went number 1 in the UK with the worst single of the year The Time (Dirty Bit).

There was also some Royal news as the Norwegian king had an affair, Prince William finally proposed to his Kate, Danish Queen Margrethe II turned 70 and Princess Mary of Denmark got pregnant again (baby expected to drop any minute now).

Let's face it, it's not really about *them* though, is it? It's about me. I can do that, this being my blog and all. So, shall we?

Book Challenge

The challenge of the last few years, was for me to read 12 books. One per month. However as I mentioned earlier, I can't remember the last time I picked up a book. So it was rather shocking for me to realise I've read 16 books!

Not all the books were mentioned here on the blog, so I'll list them all for your viewing pleasure.

My Side of the Story by Will Davis

See here

I Lick My Cheese and Other Notes: From the Frontline of Flatsharing by Oonag O'Hagan

See here

The Straight Road to Kylie by Nico Medina

See here

The Distance Between Us by Bart Yates

See here

The Sims 3: World Adventure Game Guide by Prima Games

It's a game guide, so I can become even more enlightened when it comes to the true glory of The Sims 3

The Englor Affair by JL Langley

See here

The Broken H by JL Langley

See here

Handyman by Claire Thompson

See here

The Assignment by Evangeline Anderson

See here

Lovers Who Stay With You by David MacMillian

Basically an erotic anthology with a vampire theme. Not at all my thing. I read a few of the stories but it left me a bit sick and I had nightmares. Not at all sexy.

Precious by Sapphire

See here

Being Human: The Road by Simon Guerrier

See here

Being Human: Chasers by Mark Michalowski

A sequel to the other Being Human book.

Being Human: Bad Blood by James Goss

A sequel to the other Being Human books.

Pretty in Plaid: a Life, a Witch and a Wardrobe, or the Wonder Years Before the Condescending, Egomanical, Self-Centered, Smart-Ass Phase by Jen Lancaster

See here

Most were enjoyable, but I must admit that I much prefer this one.



With the success of Book Challenge 2010, I think I'll try again next year. I've got a lot of books stashed away under my bed for these cold and snowy/rainy days. In this type of weather, I find that a good movie is there to help me along. Either at the cinema or a DVD.

Movies of 2010

I love movies, and I've got a few DVDs so in order to find out what I've actually watched this year, I've had to look through my bookshelves as well as search my mind to see what I've actually watched this year. I think Hermoine was a little too thorough when she did that Obliviate spell a few weeks ago.

Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows: Part 1

The first of the last Harry Potter movies. It had a good build-up to the big climax. I still don't fancy Harry as it just seems so wrong. He's 21 but I remember him as that little boy with the round glasses. Ewww. Can't wait to see the final movie though.

Up In The Air starring George Clooney, Vera Famiga, Anna Kendrick and Jason Bateman

This was good. You'd think any movie that's nominated for Oscars would be good. Yet, I made the mistake with Sidewaysbut Up In the Air is good. George Clooney could charm his way through anything I'm sure.

Sex & the City 2 starring 'The Girls' and Liza

Everyone says this is terrible, and was even worse than the first one. I actually prefer this to the first one. Although I must say I don't much care to get Carrie'd away. She's so whiney.

The Blind Side starring Sandra Bullock, Tim McGraw and Kathy Bates

I'm not into sports movies and the only reason why I watched this was because I adore Sandra Bullock. She delivers and deserved the Oscar. It's a wonderful movie about so much more than American football.

Post Grad starring Alexis Bledel, Jane Lynch, Carol Burnett and Michael Keaton

Sweet little chick flick starring Rory from Gilmore Girls about the troubles after you finish college.

Vampires Suck

Anything that mocks Twilight is alright in my book. I'm shocked it's not a Zucker Bros. movie.

The A-Team

Action/comedy starring the always hot Bradley Cooper. It's funny and action packed. I'm not sure if it's anything like the original TV show because I haven't watched that but the writing is not exactly Hemmingway or Henry James.

The Expendables

I'm not a fan of this. Hard hitting action with a touch of comedy. Basically it's an 80s rehash of all the B-movies these has beens have starred in. I do however fancy the pants off Jason Statham

Inception

I like the idea of this movie. The acting was good, and the CGI was not bad. A fan of CGI, I'm not but it worked in this. This wasn't CGI for the sake of CGI or cutting cost or saving a trip to the actual place.

Avatar

I watched this in early 2010 I think. Needless to say I didn't like this. It will be very difficult to find a more overrated and over exposed movie. EVER. I think I'd prefer to watch Twilight see my commentary on this here again. Blue creatures who run around on a planet and speak their own 13 word language for 162 minutes. No thank you. The story could have been, and probably was written on a cocktail napkin. My reason to watch this CGI travesty was the 3D. I had to see what that was like. Meh, I wasn't impressed.

My favorite is this one





I may have watched more movies that came out in 2010 but I honestly can't remember. That Hermoine is a skilled witch. Either that, or my Time Capsule is playing tricks on me.

TV Shows

I've followed 6 new TV Shows (new episodes) and 3 vintage ones. By vintage I mean old, taken off the air shows. They are as follows

Desperate Housewives

I wasn't too keen on Edie being fried and Kathrine being committed, but I still like it.

Being Human

I'm not really a vampire/werewolf kind of person, but I did think the idea of a ghost, werewolf and vampire living together trying to lead ordinary lives. It's good!

Hawaii Five-O 2010

I've never seen the original series, but this is action packed, bright, sunny and beautiful people. How can you not like that?

Bones

I'm not keen on dead people or soggy corpses/remains but I am keen on David Boreanaz and I like the chemistry between the characters.

White Collar

Matthew Boomer. Enough said.

Covert Affair

She fights crime in Christian Louboutins. Oh yes!

Dynasty (vintage)

I've got the first 5 seasons on DVD, and season 6 was just released in Denmark. I love that show. Takes me back. Shoulder pads and BIG hair galore.

The O.C.

I started recording this, and watching it on the weekend. However it never quite caught on. I spent some time mocking it a little on Twitter but it wasn't enough to keep me watching. Perhaps it was Tate Donovan who was just way too awkward and plasticy.

Beverly Hills 90210 (vintage)

I've been recording this on my box, and it's great. We've made it to episode 86 which is around the time the gang made it to college. The Dylan/Kelly romance (he should be with Dylan!) is a little rocky and Brenda had a brief stay in Minnesota.

My favourite



Dynasty



Biggest disappointment is still



From movies and TV we move onto music.

Top 4 albums I bought

I didn't buy a lot of albums this year. To be honest I don't buy a lot of music so it has to really catch my interest.

1. Kylie Minogue - Aprodite

The album contains the 3 singles All The Lovers, Get Outta My Way and the most recent Better Than Today. It's a complete hands up in the air dance pop album. Very positive and upbeat.

2. Scissor Sisters - Night Work

Contains singles Fire With Fire, Any Which Way and Invisible Light Utterly brilliant camptastic pop album. Pure joy with little nuggets of hilarity if you listen to the lyrics.

3. Hurts - Happiness

It's a bit Pet Shop Boys ish album. I like it. There's first single Wonderful Life which is just brilliant along with Better Than Love and Stay. Kylie joins Hurts for a duet on Devotion. Not really my type of album but I like it a lot.

4. Lady Gaga - The Fame Monster

I didn't buy the first version of this album, but I thought it would be fine to get this one. With all the 'old hits'. The only really awful track on it is the Telephone one with Beyonce. I'm not saying this album is amazing but it's a good 'greatest hits' album considering she's only done this one proper album she's done pretty well for herself. She's gone overboard with the styling though. When she put on that meat dress and the telephone hat, she became a caricature of herself. A bit of a joke really.

My singles top 10 of 2010

Kylie Minogue - Better Than Today (Club Junkies Remix)



I didn't quite know if I should pick Get Outta My Way (7th Heaven Remix) or this one, but I opted for this because it's a little bit overlooked brilliant.

2. Example - Kickstart



Love it!

3. Scissor Sisters - Any Which Way



Camptastic, and love the video.

4. Cheryl Cole - Parachute



Her most recent stuff doesn't really tickly my fancy but I like this. The video is gorgeous.

5. Hurts - Wonderful Life



Love it. I'm glad that I'm not one of those Hurts girls though. Not a fan with being too long under water. I prefer it a bit more sunny and lounging by the pool with a colourful umbrella cocktail.

6. Roll Deep - Good Times



I've never heard this on Danish radio or on any of our music video channels. I did however watch this on the UK Top 40 and I love it. It's so happy.

7. Robyn - Dancing On My Own



I remember this girl from the days of Do You Really Want Me. She was huge in Denmark back then, and voilà she is again. Love this song. She's quirky and not conventionally pretty. I mean that as a compliment.

8. Take That - The Flood



They were everywhere with this song, which is a shame really. I love it, but there is too much of a good thing (when we aren't talking Kylie). It's mostly just Robbie Williams feat. Take That. That's how I prefer it. The Robbieless Take That were boring.

9. Alexandra Burke - Start Without You



I like this song, but I do have to confess that the video does have something to do with it getting into my top 10.

10. Katy Perry - California Gurls



I hate to admit I like the song, but I thought this was great too.

From the best to the worst songs of 2010.

Top 3 worst songs of 2010

A lot of crap was released this year, but these 3 take the cake.

1. Black Eyed Peas - The Time (Dirty Bit)



Quite frankly the most hideous track of 2010. I mean, if Ann Widdicombe had released a song it would still be better than this pile of shite.

2. Rihanna - What's My Name



Just no. No, no, no, we don't care.

3. Duffy - Well, Well, Well



Well, well, well... What the fuck happened to Duffy. I mean, I've never cared for her music but this is awful.

Before we end this almost epic review, we have one more thing to do..

Top 10 hottest men of 2010

1. Ryan Reynolds



2. David Boreanaz



3. George Clooney



4. Jake Gyllenhall



5. Bradley Cooper



6. Cesc Fabregas



7. Matthew Bomer



8. Chris O'Donnell



9. Zachary Quinto



10. Mark Salling



So, the annual review is over now. Happy New Year everyone (and thanks for all the holiday wishes)

La diva danese

I'm a diva. I have strops. That's what IDV says, and while I'd love to say that I'm all peaches and cream, I'm really not. Just yesterday I had one of my strops at work.

Actually, I'm usually nice to my colleagues, but she is quite new at our team, and she keeps asking just me. I wasn't exclusively assigned to train her and I am fairly behind in my own work. She asks the same questions over and over like she isn't getting what we teach her. So, yesterday it became too much.



Miss Joanie would be proud. Actually, I wasn't mad at her, I just got frustrated both because she'd been asking the same question so much that I started doubting my answer and because I was stressed of having to take over someone elses work while she is on holiday (in California, just to rub it in I suppose). She first got a bit red in the cheeks, then she got a little bit tense before going to the loo. When she came back her mascara was a bit smudged (that's what you get for not using waterproofed I suppose). Of course I ended up emailing her (she's two desks over, and I wasn't going to walk all the way over there in my Choos) saying I was sorry. I'm such a softie.

I'm not alone in my diva incarnation though













We all have our good qualities. We appreciate good quality products, designer labels and expect to be treated like the glamorous stars we are. Living in our own world of





and who doesn't love a good catfight to work off that Beluga caviar and those sufflés



or throwing people out of hotel rooms.



To be honest though, it's a lot of work being a diva, and I've had a lot of thoughts about my blog and it's future. Should I just let it die? Or should I try to bring it back to life. As a diva, I'm allowed to change my mind, but for now bitches...

Plastic Fantastic - Dynasty Edition

I believe in makeup, botox, hell I belive in plastic surgery. The invasive kind too. There is nothing wrong with correcting something you don't like about yourself. If you've got the money and the courage, I say go for it!

Ok, confession time! I used to watch the Extreme Makeover (not Home Edition, because that makes you cry) show where they'd pick one or two really insanely unfortunate looking women. I mean seriously, you wouldn't believe it. How some of these women had found a husband and managed to become mothers, I'll never know - or want to know, but I digress. They'd take these women and make them see the same plastic surgeons, dentists and stylists and in the end they'd all end up looking the same. Like on that beauty pageant show called The Swan. I mean identical teeth, boobs, nose and hair. Everything. Except the outfit though. It got to be a little creepy so I stopped watching it. They were all like Frankenwomen.

Still I believe in all of that. You don't have to end up with the same nose as everyone else, or the same eyebrows, teeth or boobs. It all comes down to picking the right surgeon. That's a mighty difficult thing to do. Many of the Hollywood stars, the glamourama of music and soaps have been looking for years and the results are well, varied.

Say, let's look at the women of Dynasty. The Vixens of the 80s soaps. We remember the slutty black widow Alexis Morell Carrington Colby Dexter Rowan aka. Miss Joan Collins (or Joanie to her friends, like moi), or the almost always faithful ex stenographer Krystle Grant Jennings Carrington aka. Linda Evans (the quarterback at their corporate football games) or the crossover (from The Colbys) vixen Sable Scott Colby aka. Miss Stephanie Beacham (another dear, dear friend of course). Let's see how they've faired since the golden age of catfights and caviar.

Oh my. Look at all that red! Miss Joanie looks like a madam at at saloon and Linda looks well, like a man. Still, focus on their faces. This was then, and......

That's now. While you can see they've both had work done, I have to ask. What the hell happened to Linda! She went from tranny to clown. Besides, the same hairstyle as you had 20 years ago? It's really starting to creep me out.

Now onto Miss Stephanie Beacham. Well she started out on Dynasty looking like this.

Yes, we love her here at Sayhey. We adore Miss Stephanie Beacham! Then two years ago she walked onto the floor of Strictly Come Dancing looking like this.

She actually looks better these days, and I doubt she's even had anything done. Except maybe possibly a bit of botox in her forehead. But shuuuuush! Don't tell anyone.

It's all about finding the right plastic surgeon. Not just for you, but someone who actually knows what they are doing so you won't end up with wonky boobs like Posh Spice or with a face like, well, this.

Happy hunting! Whatever you do. Be careful.

Let's Google!

Ok first of all, I'd like to welcome all of you out there who don't comment but get here somehow. To all the people from Spain, buenos dias! To the people from Australia, G'day mate! Finland, Hi! I don't really speak Finnish. I don't speak whatever is spoken in Oman either, but hello to you too!

People don't get here through really weird searches, still there are a few. Here they are.

• stripper pole for ofb sims 2
  
  Eh?
  
• how tall is stephanie beacham
  
  I took the trouble to find out for you that she's 5' 7" (1.70 m) according to imdb.com
  
• "ben browder" jeans
  
  I don't remember ever mentioning him, I thought it was a brand of jeans. I was so very wrong.

• gymnastics leotard too skimpy act 1992 olympics
  
  Heh!
  
• where did Sophia Loren grow up
  
  Again, such a giver so I found out for you all. She grew up in the slums of Pozzuoli, just outside Naples (Napoli)
  
• calvin klein kicky boots
  
  They know where to go for style tips! Hah! Number 11 on google
  
• linda purl sans clothes
  
  I don't know what to say. Apparently I'm first in that search on google.

There are more, but it seems like Blogpatrol deleted them.

Confession: I love Danielle Steel

All my best ideas are borrowed from other people. So it's only natural that I was, at least, inspired by fabulous Dinah to do this post. You see, Dinah, like myself has a thing for bad TV movies. To me, that is Danielle Steel movies. You know, the characters must go through so much bad, before it all becomes absolutely perfect in the end.

I've only read a few Danielle Steel books, but I've seen some of the movies. It's not just Danielle Steel movies that I love. I Harlequin movies too. For instance A Change of Place. That one is a favorite of mine. It also reminds me a bit of a Danielle Steel movie called Star which I liked a lot. That movie starred 90210s Kelly Taylor aka. Jennie Garth. Yet my alltime favorite bad TV movie is another Danielle Steel movie.

Secrets

But before we get into the movie I think we should meet the writer

"I hope you enjoy the characters and their secrets we reveal to you"

[Cue Credits]

Let's meet the cast

Christopher Plummer as Mel Wexler

Linda Purl as Jane Adams

Gary Collins as Zack Taylor

Ben Browder (or Tom Cruise if you like) as Bill Warwick

Josie Bissett as Gaby Smith

John Bennett Perry as Dan Adams

Nicole Eggert as Alexa Adams

and special appearance by

Stephanie Beacham as Sabina Quarles

You see, Christopher Plummer is a big shot TV producer in the Aaron Spelling way. Very hands on. He wants to put together a series called Manhattan. The entire series rests on him getting Gary Collins and Stephanie Beacham signed.

Stephanie Beacham doesn't want to do it but decides to do it anyway because of financial problems due to a much darker secret.

Gary Collins is also pushed into it out of financial problems, there are due to being blackmailed by two women. He had once slept with a girl who was underage and her mother had taped it.

When Christopher Plummer had cast those two, the rest seemed pretty easy. Linda Purl jumped at the chance after her situation at home. He also cast Ben Browder whose arse apparently sold a lot of jeans. The last person to cast was Josie Bissett, a rich girl who was born into money.

As they start shooting the series the actors secrets start blowing up in their faces. Linda Purl wants a divorce from her lunatic husband and that's when the shit really hits the fan. You see, Linda Purl and Gary Collins start falling in love. So they help each other out. Linda Purl gets beaten up by her ex and her daughter finally sees her father for what he was.

Ben Browder has a junkie, prostitute wife who gets shot and he is of course accused of murdering her. Especially because she was his secret. After a while Josie Bissett falls in love with Ben Browder.

Christopher Plummer starts pursuing Stephanie Beacham from the beginning and their affair ends when he suspects that all of her secret trips to San Francisco is because of a man. She decides to run off to San Francisco in the middle of shooting and doesn't know when she's coming back. Or if. So Christopher Plummer rushes off to San Francisco to confront her with this. It takes him to a hospital where he finds her with a child, Matthew. Stephanie Beacham the finally spills the beans. She's got a son whose only chance of surviving was to have a complete heart and lung transplant.

Ah, the drama! There is only one thing better than a soap and that is a movie about making a soap. You must watch it.

Previously on Dynasty

Cue Bill Conti




Cue intro

And ACTION!

[Alexis]: Would you please tell me what's going on here?
[Dex]: Redecorating m'am
[Alexis]: But I didn't order any redecoration, would you please stop it
[Dex]: But I've got a crew here
[Alexis]: I don't care what you've got, I am ordering you to stop
[Dex]: Sorry m'am I would like to oblige but..
[Alexis]: Would you stop that hammering, it's giving me a headache. Do you know who I am?
[Dex]: Listen lady..
[Alexis]: No you listen to me, I am the owner of this hotel

Enter Sable Colby

[Sable]: Previous owner darling
[Alexis]: What are you doing here?
[Sable]: Redecorating, this hotel I just bought
[Alexis]: You, bought?

Sable looks at Dex

[Sable]: Excuse us please
[Dex]: Take 5 guys!
[Sable]: Yes, didn't your friend Dexter tell you?
[Alexis]: I sold this hotel to Bravillian resorts
[Sable]: Mmmmhm, I own Bravillian resorts, so now I own The Carlton
[Alexis]: Really? Well you may have bought more that you bargained for.
[Alexis]: Why did you buy my hotel?
[Sable]: But that's what Bravillian Resorts does darling
[Sable]: It acquires rundown properties that have been poorly maintained.
[Sable]: Like yourself.
[Alexis]: Funny, your husband, the one who dumped you..
[Alexis]: ...for your younger sister. Didn't find me poorly maintained
[Alexis]: That's what this little vendetta is all about, isn't it? First LA, now here
[Sable]: Really?
[Alexis]: Yes really! Over my relationship with Jason but it's all so ridiculous..
[Alexis]: ..because it really didn't mean anything, especially to me
[Sable]: Don't flatter yourself, you never had a relationship with Jason
[Alexis]: Actually you are right, that's true it was more of a...fling!
[Alexis]: But it was terribly romantic and he was mad about me, remember?
[Sable]: Alexis, consider this official notice I want you out of here in 30 days
[Alexis]: On who's orders?
[Sable]: On court orders if I have to
[Alexis]: And if I have to, I'll nullify the sale, I won't be kicked out of my own home
[Sable]: Kicked out or thrown out, the choice is yours..
[Sable]: I really don't care how you go, but you will go!
[Alexis]: You are so amazingly vendictive, did you really buy this entire hotel
[Alexis]: just to evict me?
[Sable]: Of course not darling!
[Sable]: Getting rid of you is just part of the upgrading process
[Sable]: Now if you don't mind, my man wishes to get back to his work
[Alexis]: I'll help him!

Alexis throws a hammer through the wall

[Sable]: Oh please!
[Alexis]: I haven't finished with you cousin, not by a long shot!
[Sable]: Oh you are finished alright, you just don't know it yet.