Tuesday, May 26, 2009

Shick! Tantsui, Muzika - Zazhigai!

So there was the Eurovision Song Contest live from Moscow. Did you miss it? I didn't. I've seen the show twice. First the Danish transmission which was rubbish because the commentator was dull. Very dull. Then of course I watched the UK transmission. I do that every year because Sir Terry Wogan is hilarious with his dry wit. This year Graham Norton (we love him!) took over, mocking the contestants and hosts and well everything. I was shocked at how nice he was through it all, but it was an amusing 3 hours and 15 minutes. I wouldn't have spent it any other way (well, I did consider turning off the TV during the Danish transmission because I've been better entertained watching specs of dust float through the air).

Before we begin I just have to mention how ridiculous that the Russian police interrupted and arrested gay demonstrators on the day was. I mean, they were hosting the gayest show in the world and they didn't want gay people in the streets with banners? Idiots. A PR nightmare I'd say. Anyway I'm going to take you through this event in the best way possible.

It started off like it always does with an intro. Since the circus (no, I'm not talking about Britney showing her minky on stage) is so popular in Russia and 40 percent of Cirque du Soleil are Russian it was only natural that they opened the show. The links in the name of the performer and title of the song are to a youtube video of the performance. Click and watch, it's definately worth it.

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Next up, last years Russian winner Dima Bilan took to the stage, had a bit of a wardrobe malfunction. Tee-hee.

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Then he flew through the air with the angel. Nice bulge. Singing, yes he was singing too. His song "Believe". I liked that, the bulge and the song, not so much the hair. At least he wore shoes. He also ran through walls on stage, that was before he started flying.

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The hosts. The one in the tangerine loo brush dress is Alsou - the female host. She almost won some years ago by singing her song "Solo" I think. I liked that song a lot. The man host, he was adorable. His name is Ivan.

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The lineup. Remember, you can't vote for your own country, and don't vote now because your vote won't count and you may be charged.

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Lithuania. Sasha Son, Love. It wasn't very good.

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Next up was Israel. It was a very political concept. One of the women is jewish and the other an arab. Noa & Mira Awad, There Must Be Another Way. - Really there should be, because that was horrible. Everything from the hideous goth outfits to the atrocious song and bad vocals.

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France was the third song. Patricia Kaas, Et S'il Fallait Le Faire. Very intense, I felt rather violated and not in the good way. It was as much the song as it was the performance and the look. She scares me. She wore nice shoes though.

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After that intense experience we moved on to a bit of popera. Swedens Malena Ernman, La Voix. She wore a very expensive, yet ugly dress. Her face resembles the swedish contestant last year. I dubbed her Nessie. No doubt this one could sing, but it was just too ridiculous and loud.

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Song number 5 was by Igor Cukrov feat. Andrea, Lijepa Tena. I quite fancy Igor for some reason, and that reason is not his hideous boots. The shame! The song not so much. It sounds like the kind these balkan countries dish up every year.

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Next up was Portugals Flor-De-Lis, Todas As Ruas Do Amor. This is sort of a Portugese, large womans version of Mika. Graham Norton liked this for some reason. I couldn't understand why, but watching it now for the third time...no I still don't like it. It's light years better than last years Portugese entry. Remember the fat women?

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After Portugal came Iceland. Last year I LOVED the Icelandic entry and this year they were, again, one of my favorites. Partly because the girl looks a bit like Rachel McAdams and partly because the song is so beautiful. An added bonus is that she's wearing a blue 1980s prom dress. Her hair is lovely. Yohanna, Is It True?

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Song number 8 came from Greece. Now I liked the Greek entry. Very 80s. It was a catchy pop song, and I really liked his box. Sakis Rouvas, This Is Our Night. Another favorite of mine, but unfortunately it wasn't his night.

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Song number 9 was from Armenia. Inga & Anush, Jan Jan. Apparently they wore traditional costumes. I found the song to be awful, and the women looking like ethnic witches. The dancing seemed a bit like something you'd do before or while putting a curse on someone. Maybe IDV can elaborate?

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Next up was the host country Russias entry. Anastasia Prikhodko, Mamo (means mother). I didn't like this song. The performance was dull and the dress uninspired. There was absolutely nothing special about it, except for the screens behind her where her face kept aging through the performance. That was a bit nifty. Apparently she is Ukrainian.

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Azerbaijan was up next. Aysel & Arash, Always as song number 11. A very catchy song. I liked it. A favorite for sure. Notice her sparkly knickers.

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Song number 12 was Regina, Bistra Voda from Bosnia & Herzegovina. On a side note, if you click the link you'll get the youtube video and the commentator is the Danish one. Just in case you want to hear how dull he sounds. As far as Regina goes, they are not only an ugly boyband, rivaling Ozone (remember those? Liquid Dreams anyone?) it's also a really bad song.

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This was the time for an ad break. While that was happening in most of Europe, both Denmark and the UK were treated to another host. Irena Ponaroshku. She made poor Moscow police etc. singing. Bless. At least it wasn't as atrocious as it was last year in... I can't remember where it was last year. Slovenia? Her hair is pretty.

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After this little gem, the next song - lucky number 13 was from Moldova. Nelly Ciobanu with Hora Din Moldova (you'd think that meant your Moldovan whore but no). Lot's of screaming and jumping. It's a wonder it got any points at all. I never understood why there was a man with a broom in the far corner.

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After the Moldovan Hora, we had Chiara from Malta with a power ballad, What If We. I really didn't like this one. Graham Norton came up with all the obvious jokes such as how she is very friendly. She never met a Malteser she didn't like. Priceless. Cruel but fun, but she just stood there gesturing with her arms and when she took the mic from the stand she moved the stand with a little trouble. Rather than walking out from behind it.

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Estonias contribution was up next. Song number 15, Urban Symphony, Rändajad. I was hypnotised by her bangs. Other than that, she looked nice. Too bad the song wasn't as good. Still there were worse. There always are. They sure liked the wind machine, like it was just invented.

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Song number 16 was Denmarks very own, or well... It's Brinck with Believe Again. It was written by Ronan Keating and for some reason this guy performed it as him. The ultimate karaoke I suppose. But why does he stand like that? It looks like he's riding something or doing something little boys may do in their pants. It looks ridiculous.

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Song number 17 was from Germany, Alex Swings Oscar Sings, Miss Kiss Kiss Bang. I absolutely love this because it's Eurovision at it's finest. So kitchy! Get those silver trousers on, get your shirt open and HEY! Miss Dita Von Teese! This is why we love Eurovision. The song is well, if nothing else, then quite catchy and the singer has a bad tan and very surprised eyebrows.

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Hadise, Düm Tek Tek from Turkey was up next. Very catchy. A little too Shakira copy kitten. Could she wear less clothes? I think not.

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Song number 19 from Albania. Kejsi Tola, Carry Me In Your Dreams. This is where the weirdness begins. Blue creature and mimes? Her dress is a little strange too. It's not a favorite of mine that's for sure. Nice shoes though.

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Next up was Norway, Alexander Rykak, Fairytale. Complete with violins and a face I'd like to slap. The song is annoying and I just don't get it. It was just too bizarre.

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Then the hosts came back. Alsou in a cheap looking wrapping paper dress dating back to sometime in the 1980s. Possibly a bridesmaids dress.

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Another favorite of mine. Svetlana Loboda, Be my Valentine! from the Ukraine. Obviously not for her or the singing. The song is catchy, and lovely boots though. Her dancers are quite fit too.

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Song number 22 from Romania was performed by Elena, The Balkan Girls. Very catchy and I quite liked it. Although the girl who appears to be singing the lead vocal looks a bit like the host from last year and that woman was scary! Her voice cut through bone and marrow.

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Next up was Jade Ewen, It's My Time joined on stage by Lord Andrew Lloyd Webber. This was another favorite of mine. For once I didn't pity vote for the UK. It was great. Jade is also so pretty. She nailed it. It was a bit musical'ish though but I suppose when Lord Webber is involved that's what it's all about.

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Song number 24 from Finland took us all back to the 1980s with an Eminem character. Waldo's People, Lose Control. Bless. I quite liked the hook but all that rapping was very very very, oh so very bad. At least they didn't send Lordi again. Bless.

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Last song of the night came from Spain. Soraya Arnelas, La Noche Es Para Mi. A very poor song and for some reason I really didn't like her. The best bit was when she disappeared unfortunately she reappeared again. Damn!

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Once the show was over, they had to get the voting started. Since two astronauts at some International space station had nothing better to do, they started the voting.

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While the voting happened there were some massive plastic pools being lowered down over the audience in which acrobats, swimmers or dancers were doing all sorts of things. It didn't come across as beautifully on screen as I'm sure it did in the venue.

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After the votes were counted, they were announced.

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A winner was picked, a superior winner vote wise. Notice how the UK made the top 5!

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Dima Bilan hesitating giving the Norwegian boy his trophy.

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Alexandre: Give me the trophy you old Ruski has been.
Dima: Shuddup, you don't deserve it you Norwegian troll

Bless. Can't wait for next years party! I hope Graham Norton will be back.

Sunday, May 24, 2009

Blur

You might ask yourself what 'Petra has been up to lately. What's been going on since the move and why am I only updating every once in a while? Or what's been going on with me in the past few weeks. I wish I could tell you, it's all been a bit of a blur. After I moved back here, I thought my life would be dinner parties, cocktail parties, Wii parties and movie nights with friends. Honestly I don't know what I spend my time doing anymore but here is a clue.







I know the events but I can't put a date on them. I've upped my work hours from 37 to 39 and a half hours per week. This was done by April 1st actually but for some reason I only started appreciating it now. Maybe because my bank account felt it now for the first time. To be honest I didn't actually feel as much as I had hoped. Turns out if I start doing the math to see how much I get paid hour, I get very disappointed. Still, it's better than nothing I suppose and it's not like I wouldn't be at work anyway so I might as well get paid for it. However little it is.

Over the past two weeks I watched the following










Unfortunately I couldn't find my favorite episode from Season 4 on youtube, in which Emily Gilmore (Lorelais mother and Rorys grandmother) goes mental at a mall.

I also finished a book called Mysterious Skin by Scott Heim which was fairly good. It was another pretty sad and depressing book, which I've been reading a lot of recently and it's got to stop sometime. This book makes number 6 this year which marks the halfway mark. The book was actually pretty well written and the characters were, albeit not the nicest, well written and I did to my horror identify with a few of them. I don't believe in UFOs though and would never stick my hand inside a dead cow - or a live one for that matter.

Apart from those things, I've had 5 pretty memorable days.

Thursday last week I went to the movies and watched Angels & Demons after work. It was a company thing where we could get tickets at reduced prices including popcorn and soda. I may have been the only one who didn't care for the Dan Brown book, or I was the only one who weren't afraid to say it out loud. I really didn't like that book. I also am not a fan of Tom Hanks and what was the first thing we saw? Tom Hanks in nothing but a blue speedo. Oh.My.God.No! It did pick up and the movie was a lot more enjoyable than the book but they should have cast someone else than Tom Hanks because he's just so annoying. Yet it was a fairly average movie and I did enjoy it for the most part.

Friday last week was a company outing. Not for the whole company, but our team was meeting with the law firm we use. We left work at noon and I stumbled in my front door at close to 1am. It started with us hearing the ins and outs of the estates of deseased persons. To be honest I thought it would be boring, but I was pleasantly surprised that it wasn't. Then we met the lawyers and their secretaries that we deal with daily. We had a glass of Moët and went to dinner. I know there was wine, and cognac and a very large slice of Tiramisu and beer. Everyone was very nice and I didn't make a big drunken fool out of myself. Pheeeeew!

Saturday was the Eurovision Song Contest live from Moscow, but more on that later.

Tuesday this week I was picked up by my boss at 6.30am for a trip to Copenhagen to visit my former colleagues. Apparently they needed to be explained some things but it turned out it wasn't because they didn't understand, but rather that they didn't want to understand how things worked. It was nice to see them again and it made realise that I made the right decision to move. The trip gave me the opportunity to talk to my boss in a more informal environment and we got to know each other a little bit better. When I say "a little bit better" I do mean a little bit. Nothing rude if that's what you are thinking. Shame on you! I'm nothing if not a professional. Ok, rude but it's not supposed to be. And it wasn't. We talked about a lot of things. Including books. When he heard I liked reading he immediately asked what and when I mentioned I was reading The Remains of the Day by Kazuo Ishiguro the conversation came to a stand still. So naturally I had to tell him about another book, something more to his taste. Since I knew he probably wouldn't appreciate My Fair Captain (with fisting and all) by J. L. Langley I mentioned a thriller I'd just purchased called Amberville by Tim Daly. It worked up until I mentioned that it takes place in an alternate world of teddy bears which I happen to find quite ingenious. He didn't and the conversationen ended right there. We didn't speak for a good 15 minutes after that. He did have me home by 8.15pm, bless him.
Then Thursday this week it was Star Trek day! This movie was beyond awesome. I cannot tell you how much awesomeness this movie was. It was, awesome. Some colleagues and I were supposed to go, but most of them couldn't because Thursday was a bank holiday here and they had things to do. Too bad for them! They missed a great outing.
In the end we were 3 people going. The girl I usually go to the movies with, we have almost the same taste in movies except she liked Failure to Launch. What a terrible movie. Bleugh. The other person going with us was a guy I've got a massive crush on, so it was pretty risky asking him to go with us. He's a total comic book geek and he's so lovely. Best part is that he isn't rude to me. Perish the thought. Well we went, the movie was well, awesome! and then he went home. I went to dinner with the girl and we had a lovely evening. She found it quite disturbing that I hadn't watched any of the other Star Trek movies. I told her to start looking up the series because she's never watched any of those.
Oh, how strange was it seeing the guy from American Pie and Sylar as a Vulcan? I completely bought it and totally understand Uhura because who wouldn't, freaky hair and all.. As of now I'm practicing my Vulcan sign and stuff. I want to be a Trekkie.

Thursday, May 21, 2009

Very slowly

I've been doing this whole slight diet thing for a while now. I started February 1st and lately I've been doing the 45 minute walk home from work every day. I've been lucky that it hasn't rained heaviely but it wouldn't matter. I'm hooked.

So this day marks the day where goal number 1 was reached. I've lost 10 kilos (it's actually 10,1 kg). It's not been that difficult although there were days when I really just wanted to say sod it. That's because I do jump on the scale every morning and some days it's blessing me with a lower number but on other days it groans a bit and massively disappoints me. I do realise that I shouldn't do the weighing more than once a week but I'm too curious and I like to have a documentation of my journey. Complete in an Excel spreadsheet with graphs and highs and lows.

My next goal is another 10 kilos but I won't put too much pressure on myself, I'm taking it one day at a time.


Sunday, May 10, 2009

Battle of the vixens

I was just doing a bit of Youtubing the other night when I suddenly found out that Paula Abdul - you all remember her right? Cold Hearted, Straight Up and the one with the cat - had a new single coming out. How about that! Personally I loved the last one she did, Dance Like There's No Tomorrow - a real hands in the air moment in my opinion. The only problem was that when she performed the song, she didn't sing live.

Her new track "I'm Just Here For The Music" is actually a Kylie Minogue reject. Kylie recorded a demo version of it which was leaked online and well, it's miles better than Paula Abduls version. Again Paula didn't perform live when she showcased it on American Idol. Apart from that, she put on a good show.



Since there is no official video or performance by Kylie you'll have to make do with this fan made video. No, I didn't make it, as I'm just not that clever..


Friday, May 08, 2009

Great original - and the cover is....?

Don't tell anyone, but I love Erase and Rewind by the Cardigans




The cover that Sabrina did of the song this year is well, I'll let you be the judge


Thursday, May 07, 2009

Beloved

The Beloved - Sweet Harmony

Circa sometime in the 1990s. I love it.

Tuesday, May 05, 2009

Word is out

When I was about 12 I had very few friends, so my days after school would be mostly doing my homework, playing in my room or taking our dog for walks around the neighbourhood. OK, so I walked the dog every day after school and again on weekends. I, mostly, did what I was told. Emptied the dishwasher and such when I was told to, but walking the dog wasn't my task.

The thing is, I grew up close to a lake with a big forest around it. It was very idyllic.



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Dividing the lake and the area where I grew up was a big road. Connected to the big road was a little truckstop which had one of those disgusting public restrooms and a little area with hedges and tables. On weekends in the summer it would be packed with families who had driven to the lake to swim and spend the day at the two beaches. At any other time of the year the truckstop would be almost abandoned.

I remember one time when I was around 8 or 9 years old and I had gone with our neighbours daughter to the lake to catch fish for their pond. As I'd had a massive arguement with my mother just minutes before, I'd gone against her will. Well, we went to the lake and started catching some zebra striped fish and suddenly the high heavens opened up, and within seconds we were drenched. As the thunder and lightning began, we retreated to the disgusting restroom at the truckstop. The girl told me stories of how these truckers would come and look for 'company' there whenever they drove by. I was shocked. I had never heard of anything like that before. A few years later it was confirmed when my evil brother told me the same thing.

I was intrigued and that's when I started walking the family dog. What my parents didn't know was that I never made it to the forest. I'd go to the truckstop and I'd tie up the dog to a tree and go into the disgusting restroom. Inside there were scribbles on the walls of the stalls and sometimes the light bulb would be broken. It was a strange feeling I'd get when I was in there.

Over the next couple of years, I'd go there at different times. In the evening, at night, at noon, and in the afternoon, but I never ever saw anyone in there. Ever. To be honest, I don't know what I would have done if there would have been someone there because I wasn't exactly sure what I was looking for. Yet I wanted whatever it was.

The disappointment was devastating but now, looking back I'm happy that nobody ever came. Those things can really screw up a boys life, and my life was, and is screwed up enough already. But back then I..... I guess I was just looking for company and validation, something I wasn't getting anywhere else and I ended up settling for myself. So I started using my permanent markers writing something else on paper rather than stall doors.


Sunday, May 03, 2009

Plastic Fantastic - Dynasty Edition

I believe in makeup, botox, hell I belive in plastic surgery. The invasive kind too. There is nothing wrong with correcting something you don't like about yourself. If you've got the money and the courage, I say go for it!

Ok, confession time! I used to watch the Extreme Makeover (not Home Edition, because that makes you cry) show where they'd pick one or two really insanely unfortunate looking women. I mean seriously, you wouldn't believe it. How some of these women had found a husband and managed to become mothers, I'll never know - or want to know, but I digress. They'd take these women and make them see the same plastic surgeons, dentists and stylists and in the end they'd all end up looking the same. Like on that beauty pageant show called The Swan. I mean identical teeth, boobs, nose and hair. Everything. Except the outfit though. It got to be a little creepy so I stopped watching it. They were all like Frankenwomen.

Still I believe in all of that. You don't have to end up with the same nose as everyone else, or the same eyebrows, teeth or boobs. It all comes down to picking the right surgeon. That's a mighty difficult thing to do. Many of the Hollywood stars, the glamourama of music and soaps have been looking for years and the results are well, varied.

Say, let's look at the women of Dynasty. The Vixens of the 80s soaps. We remember the slutty black widow Alexis Morell Carrington Colby Dexter Rowan aka. Miss Joan Collins (or Joanie to her friends, like moi), or the almost always faithful ex stenographer Krystle Grant Jennings Carrington aka. Linda Evans (the quarterback at their corporate football games) or the crossover (from The Colbys) vixen Sable Scott Colby aka. Miss Stephanie Beacham (another dear, dear friend of course). Let's see how they've faired since the golden age of catfights and caviar.






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Oh my. Look at all that red! Miss Joanie looks like a madam at at saloon and Linda looks well, like a man. Still, focus on their faces. This was then, and......





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That's now. While you can see they've both had work done, I have to ask. What the hell happened to Linda! She went from tranny to clown. Besides, the same hairstyle as you had 20 years ago? It's really starting to creep me out.

Now onto Miss Stephanie Beacham. Well she started out on Dynasty looking like this.




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Yes, we love her here at Sayhey. We adore Miss Stephanie Beacham! Then two years ago she walked onto the floor of Strictly Come Dancing looking like this.



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She actually looks better these days, and I doubt she's even had anything done. Except maybe possibly a bit of botox in her forehead. But shuuuuush! Don't tell anyone.

It's all about finding the right plastic surgeon. Not just for you, but someone who actually knows what they are doing so you won't end up with wonky boobs like Posh Spice or with a face like, well, this.


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Happy hunting! Whatever you do. Be careful.

Friday, May 01, 2009

Disco Inferno

I've always been a little different when it comes to my taste in music, and I've been mocked, teased and tormented about it ever since I can remember. Still, I never conformed to what other people found was 'proper' music. Somehow I never found dull, depressing rock bands particularly inspiring or uplifting. My genre was always pop, mostly female artists or bands which my CD collection is proof of. At the moment I've only got one CD rack up, the rest of my CDs are safely hidden away in a drawer. All my Kylie CDs are not hidden away but are not in my CD rack. The CDs on display are the following


  • Pet Shop Boys - Pop Art (Special Limited 3 disc edition)
  • Pet Shop Boys - Nightlife
  • Pet Shop Boys - Fundamental
  • Robbie Williams - Sing When You're Winning (Special Collectors Edition)
  • Robbie Williams - Rudebox (Special Edition)
  • Robbie Williams - Swing When You're Winning
  • Robbie Williams - Greatest Hits
  • Dannii Minogue - Neon Nights (Deluxe Edition)
  • Dannii Minogue - The Hits & Beyond
  • Madonna - Music
  • Madonna - Let Me Tell You A Secret
  • Madonna - The Immaculate Collection
  • Madonna - American Life
  • Madonna - The Confessions Tour
  • Madonna - Confessions On A Dance Floor
  • Madonna - Hard Candy
  • Madonna - Ray Of Light
  • Madonna - Bedtime Stories
  • Madonna - Something To Remember
  • Madonna - Remixed & Revisited
  • Britney Spears - Circus (Deluxe Edition)
  • Britney Spears - Greatest Hits (Limited Edition)
  • Britney Spears - In The Zone
  • Britney Spears - Britney
  • Britney Spears - Oops!... I Did It Again
  • Britney Spears - ....Baby One More Time
  • Girls Aloud - Tangled Up
  • Girls Aloud - The Greatest Hits (Special Edition)
  • Sugarbabes Vs. Girls Aloud - Walk This Way (Comic Relief CD single)
  • Girls Aloud - Chemistry
  • Sophie Ellis-Bextor - Trip The Light Fantastic
  • Sophie Ellis-Bextor - Read My Lips
  • Goldfrapp - Black Cherry
  • Goldfrapp - Supernature
  • Calvin Harris - I Created Disco (Limited Glow In The Dark Edition)
  • Holly Valance - Footprints
  • Just Jack - Overtones (US Edition)
  • Rachel Stevens - Funky Dory
  • Rachel Stevens - Come And Get It (Limited Edition)
  • N'Sync - Greatest Hits
  • Mika - Life In Cartoon Motion
  • Paula Abdul - Forever Your Girl
  • Paula Abdul - Spellbound
  • Paula Abdul - Head Over Heels
  • Paula Abdul - Greatest Hits
  • Spice Girls - Spice
  • Spice Girls - Spice World
  • Spice Girls - Forever
  • Spice Girls - Greatest Hits
  • Geri Halliwell - Schizophonic
  • Geri Halliwell - Passion
  • Geri Halliwell - Scream If You Wanna Go Faster
  • Scissor Sisters - Scissor Sisters
  • Scissor Sisters - Ta-Dah! (Special Edition)
  • Various Artists - Radio 1 Established 1967
  • Janet Jackson - Designs Of A Decade
  • Janet Jackson - The Velvet Rope
  • Janet Jackson - Janet
  • Janet Jackson - Janet Remixed
  • Janet Jackson - Damita Jo
  • Janet Jackson - 20 Y.O.
  • The Killers - Day & Age

Disclaimer: I bought the two last Janet Jackson albums for £2 each. I know and like maybe 2 tracks on both albums combined, so I take no responsibility for those.

As I don't listen to everything they play in the radio these days, I tend to turn it off when I hear of bands called things like The Killers, Coldplay, Kings of Leon or something like that. The same goes for rap music and RnB. Like, how ghastly is the Flo Rida track "You Spin My Head Right Round"? (murdering a classic I must say, a gang drive by if you like).

Anyway, The Killers. I was watching the Danish VH-1 channel and the VJ started talking of Pet Shop Boys and mentioned The Killers and a video called Human. He showed it.

I liked the video. Brandon Flowers is really cute too. I like him. A. Lot. I like his voice too, and after this song, they played another new track 'Spaceman'

I quite liked those two tracks, so I bought the album. The thing is though, I only really like those two tracks. If pushed, I may like the track Losing Touch, other than that it's a really bland album and it shows why I don't listen to bands like that. All in all, it was a £7 album so I can't complain.

By the way, I am surprised I have that many Madonna albums. I blame bargain bins.